What a beautiful tribute to sweet Sam. That last line - though so simple - really got me.
The social media space for grief is an interesting one - I think it can offer a way to share in a protected way and try to share what yiur (subjective/changing) memory feels rather than just sees. I guess I think a lot of the personal va collective and the way sharing in this way makes your grief a part of the collective memory to some extent. I think of this today, too, because I’m seeing some compelling posts of people’s experiences on 9-11.
Thank you for such a thought provoking post in the midst of your own grief. And thank you for your memory collaboration and the kind words at the start of your article. 💙
Thank you Kathleen, I think there was something about him being a member of our family that was behind the 'need' to share my autobiographical memories.
Have you heard of Flashbulb Memories./events? (or FBMs), 9-11, Kennedy assassination, Princess Diana death, or the Challenger disaster, are examples of FBM phenomenons where our autobiographical memory and collective memory intersects. We think the Amygdala (emotion centre of the brain) plays a part in laying down these memories, and why we have that distinct memory of where we were, and what we were doing when historical events took place.
9-11 is especially thought of as a worldwide flashbulb event, and the mechanism of memory making might help us explain why when we think about the way the event was played over and over, on TV, it allowed for significant 'event rehearsal'.
I was working in a 999, directory enquiries and International enquiries contact centre at the time of the 9-11 event, we had TV screens set to BBC world news to enable us to understand breaking news events and call demand. The vivid memory I have is one of escalating noise as our switchboard became overwhelmed for international calls from relatives.
However, flashbulb memories do not = accurate, and we don't quite understand the full mechanism of how they work. There are also studies showing that we have 'false' collective memories around events we believe to have happened, this gives evidence of the ongoing malleability of our memory that is taking place as we process emotions.
This false collective memory is really interesting as well. Thanks for sharing all this. Just today I see an agent at the JFK assassination has a “different version” of what happened that day.
This is such a beautiful tribute to your well loved Sam. Thank you for sharing Sam and your love with us. The world needs so much more of this right now. I needed this right now. You painted such beautiful pictures for us with your words. xx
"Instead, we now think that our memories are an ongoing interpretation and convergence of processing, a process of consolidation, and they can be just as vulnerable in the long term to memory decay, in a process called deconstruction."
Fascinating topic, Leila. As a previous dog owner, I can relate. We haven't had a dog for years now.
I mentioned the Peak-End rule to Kate the other day in her YSL article and she linked me here, I have not heard of flashbulb memory events before and thought of it as a peak experience which etches itself into our brains (collectively). I can see though how it is more than merely a Peak-End memory since everyone is able to recollect what they did or where they were on 9/11, whereas our memories of our dogs are for us, similar in potency, though.
Augmentation via BMI aims to help the process of retention and prevent deconstruction (Neuralink vs Alzheimer) but for that, we will first have to fully understand how the human brain works.
What a beautiful tribute to sweet Sam. That last line - though so simple - really got me.
The social media space for grief is an interesting one - I think it can offer a way to share in a protected way and try to share what yiur (subjective/changing) memory feels rather than just sees. I guess I think a lot of the personal va collective and the way sharing in this way makes your grief a part of the collective memory to some extent. I think of this today, too, because I’m seeing some compelling posts of people’s experiences on 9-11.
Thank you for such a thought provoking post in the midst of your own grief. And thank you for your memory collaboration and the kind words at the start of your article. 💙
Thank you Kathleen, I think there was something about him being a member of our family that was behind the 'need' to share my autobiographical memories.
Have you heard of Flashbulb Memories./events? (or FBMs), 9-11, Kennedy assassination, Princess Diana death, or the Challenger disaster, are examples of FBM phenomenons where our autobiographical memory and collective memory intersects. We think the Amygdala (emotion centre of the brain) plays a part in laying down these memories, and why we have that distinct memory of where we were, and what we were doing when historical events took place.
9-11 is especially thought of as a worldwide flashbulb event, and the mechanism of memory making might help us explain why when we think about the way the event was played over and over, on TV, it allowed for significant 'event rehearsal'.
I was working in a 999, directory enquiries and International enquiries contact centre at the time of the 9-11 event, we had TV screens set to BBC world news to enable us to understand breaking news events and call demand. The vivid memory I have is one of escalating noise as our switchboard became overwhelmed for international calls from relatives.
However, flashbulb memories do not = accurate, and we don't quite understand the full mechanism of how they work. There are also studies showing that we have 'false' collective memories around events we believe to have happened, this gives evidence of the ongoing malleability of our memory that is taking place as we process emotions.
This false collective memory is really interesting as well. Thanks for sharing all this. Just today I see an agent at the JFK assassination has a “different version” of what happened that day.
Hearts to your family 💙
This is such a beautiful tribute to your well loved Sam. Thank you for sharing Sam and your love with us. The world needs so much more of this right now. I needed this right now. You painted such beautiful pictures for us with your words. xx
"Instead, we now think that our memories are an ongoing interpretation and convergence of processing, a process of consolidation, and they can be just as vulnerable in the long term to memory decay, in a process called deconstruction."
Fascinating topic, Leila. As a previous dog owner, I can relate. We haven't had a dog for years now.
I mentioned the Peak-End rule to Kate the other day in her YSL article and she linked me here, I have not heard of flashbulb memory events before and thought of it as a peak experience which etches itself into our brains (collectively). I can see though how it is more than merely a Peak-End memory since everyone is able to recollect what they did or where they were on 9/11, whereas our memories of our dogs are for us, similar in potency, though.
Augmentation via BMI aims to help the process of retention and prevent deconstruction (Neuralink vs Alzheimer) but for that, we will first have to fully understand how the human brain works.
Thanks for this insightful article, Leila.